Being willing to sound bad

Brenda, a friend of mine, posted on Facebook awhile back, “that in order to be good at something, you have to first be willing to be bad at it for quite a while”…

About a week before I had stumbled onto this post, I’d already committed to playing the ukelele for 15 minutes a day. I wanted to eventually get to the point where I could say with complete authenticity, “Yes, I CAN play the ukelele!”

I was “showing up” everyday to play, and was just beginning to realize how far I needed to travel to get to that place of being able to play - not kind of play, but really play. And I realized that there’s a looooong way between those two places.

I began to feel a tad defeated because I’m a perfectionist, and that nagging voice began blabbering away in my head. I remembered when I tried to learn to play the guitar light years ago, at age 12, and my fingers were crying after just a few minutes of making chords. So I gave up. I had been playing the flute and piano for a couple of years, and those instruments didn’t inflict pain on me, only the desire to keep on playing and nailing the pieces of music I was working on. But the guitar? Mmm mmmm. There was a huge absence of desire to press on and accomplish the mastering. So I let the guitar go, and it was a bittersweet decision.

For so many of us who’ve put down an instrument during our childhood or teenage years, for whatever reason, we often end up regretting it.

So back to the ukelele and Brenda’s post…I’d put in my fifteen minutes of practice for the day, complete with oven timer, whose annoying beep-beep-beep also congratulates me that I have accomplished my little ukelele music goal for the day. Those familiar thoughts from the sixth grade again began to take over – My fingers are hurting. This is gonna take forever. FOREVER…..blah blah blah.

To get out of that negative self talk in my head, I sat down at the computer so I could conveniently escape those rants in my head for a bit and check out who is doing what on Facebook. I’m reading, scanning, skimming and then bam, I read Brenda’s post. I chant this to myself several times – “in order to be good at something, you have to first be willing to be bad at it for quite a while”… Wow. Her words stick like peanut butter on toast and I realize she's dead on right about this.

I’ve been mulling this over many times in the last couple weeks and for me, the biggest challenge is the willing part. I have to be willing to sound bad, go slow, make a zillion mistakes, make the chord changes sloppily and badly. I have to be willing to sound badly. I have to be willing to accept that I sound badly. By being willing to be great at sounding bad, I can be a teeny bit better in another week. And in the week after that. And when my contra dance band, Fly By Night, gets together a month from now for its first rehearsal with me playing my ukelele on some Old Time tunes, I might just have a helluva great time.

And no doubt, I will not only be proud of myself for having been so good at willing to sound bad, that eventually, I will be able to see there is definitely the possibility to sound good. Maybe even pretty good! Now THAT fuels me on right now to pick up my very cute, little ukelele. For fifteen minutes. Just for today.

Thank you, Brenda.